Dear James,
I know that you have moved to Englalund, but I think you should come and get your son. He is, after all, your's. You found him. He loves you more. He will always love you more. And last night, he ate my finger. You can have him back now. I was only trying to give him his pill, for his own good I might add, the little blood-sucking monster. Okay well, maybe not ATE, but there was a lot of bleeding involved, none of it his. Nope, all the blood, from me. From my finger. Then he had the gall to still want his treats. You come fetch? Now?
kthxbai,
Bettie
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